It's Not Easy
by can
Summary: The changes in the crew from Premier to now written in different POV's


"It's Not Easy"  
  
Thanks to Neuroscpr for reading and his suggestions  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own them  
  
Prologue  
  
  
  
The crew was finally together again, but things would never be the same. Too much had happened. They were ready to go their separate ways.  
  
Aeryn, Jool and John were the only ones who hadn't found a destination yet.  
  
They had all been enriched by each other, but the time had come when each of them had to follow their own paths. This saddened them, knowing they had once been a family. But all good things must come to an end.  
  
Pilot knew the time would come eventually when the crew would decide to depart Moya. In the beginning they bothered him with all their strange ways, now he would miss it, but would respect their decision. At one time he would have been unsure of himself, but not anymore. After all they had faced and survived, he knew he was as capable as any who had piloted a Leviathan.  
  
Rygel knew he would rule his empire differently. No longer would he be the selfish being that had been disposed of his throne many cycles ago. He had learned more than he could ever acknowledge.  
  
D'Argo had learned what patience was. Hopefully he would find his son again and settle down. His ways were tempered now that he had encountered so much in life. He knew his ways weren't always necessarily the best. He was so hot tempered before. Throughout all of this he learned to listen and not demean others so readily.  
  
Aeryn knew what it felt like to finally love, and have compassion for others. She would never forget this as she finally felt as if she was truly a whole person. There was nothing that could replace this feeling. Zhaan's death was the start of the cycle for her. She felt for the first time in her life.  
  
They knew they had John Crichton to thank for all of this. They had changed in ways they could never have imagined. He had shown them what compassion and loyalty meant.  
  
They had grown so much from the early days.  
  
  
  
Rygel's point of view  
  
  
  
I'll never forget the look on his face when I spat the goo on his neck. He thought I was his ally, little did he know, I'm no ones ally. I do what's best for me. The frell with everyone else. If I had my choice I certainly wouldn't be on this ship with criminals, for I am Dominar Rygel the sixteenth.  
  
It was probably a bad idea to bring the human aboard Moya. Now they had another mouth to feed, less food for him.  
  
He couldn't understand why they trusted him. They knew nothing about him and he always seemed to be getting in the way. For all they knew he was a frelling spy for the Peacekeepers. He demanded they put him and the peacekeeper bitch on the nearest planet and be on their way. As usual no one listened to him.  
  
As the days went by, he scrutinized the human closely. He saw only sadness in this John Crichton as he tried to help the crew but only made things worse. He knew how hard it was to adjust to the unfamiliar. After all that's what he had to do for many cycles.  
  
He was interested in what kind of possessions he brought from his home planet. Unfortunately he had been caught looking through his things. He feared the worst from the human, but to his surprise he didn't hurt him. He looked upon this man in a different light now.  
  
Zhaan says he can't find his home anymore. She is constantly telling the frelling Luxan to be patient. She might as well save her breath. Luxan's are nothing but barbarians. They only think with their mivonks.  
  
It's time someone befriended the human. He would make it his duty to show the human the correct ways in this universe. The first thing he would teach him was what he was best at, self-preservation.  
  
  
  
D'Argo's point of view  
  
  
  
How could such a species exist? He hoped they were not all like John. If they were they were doomed.  
  
Granted John seemed smart, but he had no warrior instincts. In order to survive you must be willing to fight. He let a frelling peacekeeper women kick his eema!  
  
Frell, if the human was going to survive in the Unchartereds he would definitely have to learn to fight. He didn't know if he was capable of learning, he seemed so weak.  
  
How did I get so lucky to draw him into Moya? He would have to learn quickly or he would be no use to them.  
  
When he discussed him with Zhaan, she told him to have patience. Help him to learn. He is lost and doesn't understand the ways. She reminded him that John was the one who saved them from the Peacekeepers with his calculations.  
  
He allowed himself a doubt now. Perhaps I'm being harsh in my perception of this man. I didn't exactly welcome him on the ship. No, I tongued him. Maybe that's why he steps back whenever I get near him.  
  
He observed the human without him being aware of it. He saw the lost look in his eyes on many occasions. John tried to hide many of his emotions, but he was not very good at it. D'Argo knew there was some truth to Zhaan's words.  
  
He had to admit to himself, there were some redeeming qualities in the human. He was always trying to help, even though he caused more problems than they had to start with. He was also a voice of reason on many occasions, even though he would never tell him. But his incessant chatter would have to go. That was enough of a reason to tongue him!  
  
How could anyone talk so much?  
  
Zhaan tells me if I gave him a chance, she feels sure he will prove himself. Maybe she's right. Maybe we all deserve a chance.  
  
But I still can't believe he swallowed the frelling dentic!  
  
  
  
  
  
Zhaan's point of view  
  
  
  
I will admit his entrance on the Leviathan was less than grand. None of us were too friendly, preoccupied as we were. Granted Rygel's little spitting action was uncalled for, but D'Argo had to tongue him. He seemed to be getting a little out of hand. We had no idea what he would do. Little did we know how fragile and harmless John Crichton was.  
  
His encounter with peacekeeper Officer Aeryn Sun, was actually very funny if it hadn't shown how vulnerable he really was. I quickly surmised he had no understanding of our world. He wasn't a warrior like Aeryn and D'Argo, just a very frightened being so far from his home and all he knew.  
  
The rest of the crew didn't understand John, especially D'Argo. He was always so impatient when it came to him. Even when John did do something right D'Argo failed to see. He only chose to see his mistakes. Zhaan knew she had to temper this in the Luxan.  
  
John was part of the crew now, and he had to be treated as such. He had to be taught, but with patience. He was confused and lonely. She would do what she could to help the others understand him.  
  
She noticed he retreated to the terrace every night. Perhaps it gave him the solace he needs. She hoped so. He was indeed a very rare person. He displayed many emotions they lacked. In her opinion they were very endearing.  
  
In time perhaps his qualities would spread to the others. He displayed a great deal of patience for all of them, something they could definitely benefit from.  
  
Amazing, as it seemed, this man, John Crichton, had something special to teach them. If only they would be willing to listen.  
  
  
  
Aeryn's point of view  
  
  
  
He looks to me as if he wants something. What? He is the one responsible for the course my life has taken. I am no longer a Peacekeeper thanks to him and his 'You can be more'.  
  
More what? I'm stuck on this Leviathan with a bunch of escaped prisoners and him! I never should have given into his words. I can never go back to my old life now. Thank you John Crichton!  
  
Perhaps I shouldn't be so bitter. He thought he was helping me, but he didn't understand. At least he shows no fear even when he should. I guess he didn't know whom he was dealing with. Maybe there is a warrior in him somewhere, or just stupidity.  
  
I have formed a strange allegiance with the Luxan. He is after all a warrior, so at least we have something in common.  
  
But the frelling human needs to learn what we are dealing with before he gets us all killed. I will definitely need to teach him how to fight. I can't believe I took him so easily. But I can teach him.  
  
He seems eager to learn, sometimes too eager. He likes to help even when he knows nothing about the problem. Frell, I can't count how many times he's almost knocked one of Moya's systems out. Then he looks hurt when D'Argo shouts at him.  
  
Zhaan says we just need to be more patient with him; after all he's far from his home. Well I'd say that makes two of us.  
  
John definitely seems to keep his distance from the Luxan. I suppose he can feel D'Argo's frustration with him. Maybe he would relax more if D'Argo wasn't always ready to pounce on him. I'll get Zhaan to talk to him.  
  
But back to my original question, why is he always staring at me? He acts like he wants to talk to me, but then backs away. His eyes hold sadness in them, but that may be from his loss.  
  
I've never seen a species show so many emotions. It can't be healthy. Maybe that's why he talks to himself. I can hear him in his quarters talking to no one. What a strange being.  
  
Perhaps he needs someone to talk with. Could that be why he is always watching me? Aeryn was sure she had the answer now. John wanted to talk but was afraid of what her reaction would be.  
  
Patience, remembering Zhaan's words. Maybe, just maybe that would work.  
  
  
  
Pilot's point of view  
  
  
  
It may not seem apparent to the crew, but if it wasn't for the new species they brought aboard the ship, we might be back in the hands of the Peacekeepers. I for one am very grateful to John Crichton. Without his maneuver we would surely have been recaptured.  
  
We have achieved freedom at last, and I am no longer wearing a control collar. Now Moya can explore as she was born to, with me as her pilot. Starburst feels so natural now!  
  
The major problem now appears to be to settle down the crew, and accept the human as one of them.  
  
The Peacekeeper is another story. She will have to earn my trust. Granted she helped out with the maneuver, but she didn't have much choice in the matter.  
  
The Luxan seems to be the source of the problem with Crichton. He always seems to find fault with the human. But of course Luxan's are not known for patience.  
  
I can agree with D'Argo that the human doesn't know much about Moya's systems, but he just needs to be taught. I think he could learn quickly since he is a scientist. His knowledge could prove to be useful to Moya.  
  
I've talked to Zhaan about this and she assures me D'Argo will eventually accept the human. He didn't have the best welcome on the ship, but she is working on rectifying the situation.  
  
D'Argo has agreed to try and treat the human with more patience.  
  
John Crichton had saved Moya and he would be a welcome member of the crew. Pilot just wished he would stop using those strange words.  
  
  
  
John's point of view  
  
  
  
The terrace was his haven on the ship. It's the place he came to relax and clear his mind. He rejuvenated himself here, away from the rest of the crew. This was only place where no one bothered him.  
  
John ended each day here to find himself again. All he wanted was a little peace and quiet, but on this night he couldn't stop thinking about the way the others saw him.  
  
He knew he made mistakes, but he didn't think it warranted the tongue- lashings he took, especially from the Luxan. He wanted so desperately to fit in and help where he was needed, but it always seemed like he was doing the wrong thing; at least that's the way they made him feel.  
  
The loneliness was setting in again. John longed to be home where everything was familiar. The language, the faces, his home, his friends.  
  
Didn't they understand how hard this was for him? He had been ripped away from all he knew and thrown into a world he didn't understand. Hell, he couldn't even understand what half of their words meant! A microt? What's that? He felt so lost among these aliens.  
  
Zhaan was about the only one who he even tried to help him adjust. She had told him he had to prove himself. Perhaps he was trying to hard. When he used the slingshot maneuver to evade their enemy, he hoped they would look at him differently, especially the Luxan. No such luck. Maybe things would never change.  
  
John closed his eyes for a moment remembering his first encounter with Aeryn. She kicked his butt to hell and back, and then asked questions. He had hoped they could be friends, but she blamed him for her life. It was something he didn't regret though. John couldn't let her stay behind and suffer because of him. The Luxan thought him weak. He couldn't understand why anyone would do that for someone else. So be it. It was something he didn't want to lose, compassion.  
  
John gazed at the stars and felt comfort in them. Space was his life but he sure got more than he bargained for this time.  
  
  
  
John lay back with his hands under his head, content. He had seen so much violence in the little time he had been on the ship. If he was to survive he knew he had to get tougher, but he didn't want to lose himself. The possibility scared him.  
  
  
  
Hell, this should have been his dad, not him. It's what his dad lived for. John was not that type of pilot. Even though his dad wouldn't admit it, he wanted John to follow in his footsteps. John was the brain; his dad was more the daring kind, the explorer. Too bad you missed out on this one dad. You would have loved it!  
  
John reluctantly rose to his feet and sighed. Time to hit the hay. Maybe I'll eventually get used to this place. He just wished they would stop calling him the frelling human! 


End file.
